Montana Roundup, Part II

I'm considering starting a twitter account, solely to notify you all of ridiculous police reports from Montana. Part I is here. Recent "crimes" committed in the greater Flathead Lake area:

• Animal wardens responded to a King's Way residence after a neighbor called to complain they were "hoarding" rabbits.
• Bags of baby clothes were removed from the middle of U.S. 93 after they caused numerous drivers to swerve.
• An Airport Road woman told Kalispell police she awoke to find a man, possibly naked, in her bedroom. He reportedly defenestrated himself. I don't know what defenestrated means, but it sounds inappropriate.
• A fireball, accompanied by blinking lights, was reported in the Hash Mountain area. Flathead County Sheriff's deputies looked into the matter and discovered the object was an airplane, but it had never crashed. I'm so confused.
• Belligerence from a man in a wheelchair came to an end when he was sent on his way with the admonition that he could attend Alcoholics Anonymous meetings but not loiter at the location Saturday evening. When he countered with claims of animal cruelty and interference with the Americans with Disabilities Act, he was told it was an issue with him and his actions, not his dog.
• A woman called her Hungry Horse son and threatened to have an infamous motorcycle gang "take out" him and his wife--and she didn't mean for a night on the town. Flathead County Sheriff's deputies are investigating.
• Two or three men reportedly got into fisticuffs in the middle of Trap Road early Wednesday morning. I can't believe they actually published a newspaper with the word "fisticuffs" in it.

Don't worry, I have plenty of material for Part III and Part IV.